It’s almost Pride Weekend in San Diego and I am getting fun Facebook Memory reminders of years ago, but last year’s memory holds a special place. Last year was our reason’s first Pride, an experience I wouldn’t have traded the world for!

Looking at the images and the little status triggers a thought in my mind. What if I had not been there? Not just in the “I can’t support my child’s decision” gross way, but just what if I wasn’t there? What if I actually missed out on that Big First!?!  What if I missed seeing my child so happy! How loved the community and they are. How freeing that first Pride was for them! What if I missed it? And it hits me, a lot of LGBTQIAP+ Community for one reason or another don’t get to do their first or maybe any other Prides with their parents. They have to venture out and do things like Pride by themselves! I am heartbroken.

I remember way back to my first Pride and though my mom knew and was fine with me going, though even my Gay Uncle even questioned my attendance and didn’t go with me (he lived a block away, I parked at his house). He called my mom instead. Granted, Pride was a tad more “colorful” back in the day, (and no, I’m not talking about just the colors) so I kind of get it, slightly more. But today is something else! Today is definitely more of a scene of families and acceptance along with all of the other fun sprinkled in. It’s a celebration of rights fought for and won, and the fight for more. It’s amazing to see the support of the rest of the city, business, and politically!

It just seemed like such a moment, that I just could not miss it! In fact, I was determined to be that person that brought them to their first. And they needed it. That first year out is already quite a doozy, especially when you are on the younger end and living in a less progressive neighborhood. I know they needed this moment of support and I was gonna get them there no matter what.

It was everything I had envisioned! Friends of ours in and out of the parade! So many floats they could relate to. Colors! And even snowcones.

At the end of last year’s parade, my child had turned to me, hugged me, and thanked me. I remember how puzzled and baffled I was. I remember thinking, “…for what? For bringing you? Of course, I would.” Not even skipping a beat or thinking it was a question.

Then they thanked me further and hugged tighter. Oh. I get it. “Thank you for supporting me.”

And it clicks.

I never would have honestly thought it was an option. My love is unconditional, my child is just living their life, like, why would I not? How could I not? I actually tear up.

They must have noticed something in the parade moments.

There was a moment during that parade that flashes in my mind. A part where the military was marching in the parade. A few of them spotted us, myself and another Free Mom Hugs Mama, wearing our shirts cheering them all on from the sideline. They ran to us and gave us tight hugs and thanked us as well. I watched my friend tear up.

I realize that my child, my reason may have also seen what it means to others. That not all LGBTQ+ youth or even adults have it that easy. That some parents have made their love conditional and weren’t there, not just in the Pride Parade form but in life. That moment had choked me up too, but I didn’t really think anything from my child’s perspective of it.

But, looking back, I put myself in my child’s shoes. Realize, what it could have been like to be missing that parental approval. Missing the pats on the back, the hugs and happy faces of those familiar. Without that really important family support by their side.

I brought them specifically to see how loved and how supported they were from others and the community. From those outside our little home. It never hit me till that moment, when they were thanking me that they were also seeing what it would be like not having my partner and me as parents. That not all LGBTQIAP+ youth get to be as free to be themselves.

Pride is this big colorful bonding moment and I got to be there for that! My child didn’t have to sneak out with friends. Our reason didn’t have to hide who they were and shyly join the crowd. They got to enjoy it! They got to wave their colors and know that they are loved.

I hear stories of other kids that haven’t told their parents out of fear and it’s heartbreaking. No one should be scared to be themselves. No child should question if their parents love them. Love is love and love should be unconditional!

I pray that one day it becomes easy to be out. That I don’t deserve to be thanked, because I truly don’t. It should just be expected of your parents to be there, to support you, to cheer you on in all ways of their lives. I hope and pray all the LGBTQ+ youth get to live their lives happy and open as my child does.

One Day.

And, though Pride isn’t normal this year, I still encourage you to celebrate. Feel free to check out some of the ideas I shared on San Diego Moms, this may be a great way to open that conversation with your young ones too.

Happy PRIDE Everyone!