I know what you are probably thinking just reading the title, “resolution”…“Studies show that only 8% of Americans who make a New Year’s resolution actually keep them all year and 80% have failed by the start of February.” – Times-Tribune Let’s admit these stats are everywhere. We all know them. Though this isn’t my case, typically if I set myself to something I am pretty committed and determined. BUT, this year though may be a little tougher. I want to work on body acceptance, my body, no matter the stage in the game. All weights and sizes.

Honestly, I have a pretty good track record with my resolutions, but, this one, this one seems really tough.

My weight has fluctuated almost all my life, but when I was pregnant with my kiddo my body was hit hard (hyperemesis gravidarum). And between the depression of being a rough marriage, my weight gain and drop was ridiculous! No matter the number on the scale I could never say I was happy with myself.

I blame a lot of this on diet culture growing up, though. Really it’s embedded in me.

It’s probably sad to admit, but it took me FOREVER just to be okay with wearing horizontal stripes thanks to one damn mom to daughter lesson. F*^& that! I love my stripes! And well, screw those “rules”!

In the recent few years, I would even post and share like I was “happy with my body,” but I am going to be so transparent, behind that post I would be pissed! Start nitpicking! MY CHIN! “Too pointy” (these are during my “skinnier moments” or my current trigger, missing my defined chin). Honestly, low angle photos make me want to cry and takes me A LOT to post or share.

That infuriating line, too much, too little. Never just right.

It really is a weird balance because whenever I lose the weight to make that “target number” it’s like my loose skin pisses me off more! It’s an infuriating cycle in adulthood for sure.

It’s like my weight loss or gain is always too much one way or another and I am just never happy….so this is why this resolution.

I need to learn to just be happy with being healthy and accepting myself where I am.

Quarantine weight be damned! I am happy, I’m healthy as I’ve been. I’m staying at home. I’m staying safe. If my partner doesn’t care, why do I?? …and really, why would anyone care? And, no one’s opinions are going to help or matter till my opinion matters.

I really need to learn self-love and acceptance. Celebrate where I am at.

There are a few great (hate to say, but gonna say) social media “role-models” that I’ve found, (listed below). I love what they share, preach, and oddly enough I have never once judged so much as a wrinkle on them, but here I am constantly shaming! Hopefully, this will be my year to take a page out of their playbook and just love this body I was given.

If you are struggling, like me, may I recommend following them; Kayla Logan, Megan Crabbe (Bodyposipanda), and Melissa (Chasingbacklight).

Also, Please Spam Me with any encouragement that has worked for you. Any resources soooo welcomed! Diet Schemes Not Welcomed!

I’m ready to try hard for this in 2021! Let this be another resolution that sticks! (crossing fingers)